Be one of us
When something unexpected happens, the mind can easily fill up with thoughts, fears, emotions, and all kinds of things. It’s not good to stay lying in the fire, as the saying goes.
Start reaching out to others and seek the kind of help that supports you best. Begin doing things that are good for you.
Taking part in supporting others can also be a helpful direction. Take one step at a time, and we will walk alongside you at the same pace.
Healing happens in its own time, in many different ways.
The Purpose of the Support Website
The idea is to create a support website like the one I wish I had found when I needed help in 2014. My long marriage had ended after my husband was revealed to be gay. He was already living a completely separate life with changing partners, while the children and I only saw that he had become extremely strange. I even thought he might have developed dementia or something similar.
The revelation was a great shock. It was as if a stone had been thrown onto the surface of a lake and the ripples began to spread across the water. I immediately joined a divorce support group run by Leena Koivu; without it, I don’t know what would have happened. After that came a year and a half of various arrangements related to the separation.
I realized that my process was far more complicated than I had ever imagined, and I continued with individual coaching with Leena. Later I ended up on a website where I found more than 3,000 people who had gone through something similar. At that point I could finally set down the burden I had been carrying: I no longer had to bear the invisible weight so alone.
I began to understand what had been difficult and where I had actually had it easier. More generally, I came to realize what kind of phenomenon I had been dealing with. Above all, it became clear that the purpose was not to wallow in bitterness, but to accept support and help — to allow healing to happen.
These support pages are meant to exist for all of us who need support. Together we can shape the content of the site so that it best serves those who use it. You can suggest links that might help someone. You can share what has helped you.
Support for each other
You can share your thoughts, worries, and interests with us. You can ask for others’ opinions or simply receive comfort and presence. Anything that helps you move forward.
If you would like to ask something or arrange, for example, a supportive conversation with me, please write to tukeasinulle@gmail.com.
Wishing you a meaningful journey into many kinds of conversations.
Terveisin Lilja Kaariniemi